In October, the mother told him my granddaughter needed braces and asked if he would pay half, which would be $53.00/mo for 12 months. You have options if your child’s father is disobeying a child support order. Moms can be deadbeats also and its a shame that I am prevented from being a father to my wonderful son because of his selfish mother that cares more about going out for what she can get and not caring about what kind of financial burden she places on anyone. Pay child support but mother won't let father see child. As long as you are caught up with current support payments. A little bit of help would be helpful. I have never even tried to stop visitations because heck, I needed a break too. He is a pathetic loser and he will be sent back to prison again soon, I guarantee that. My son doesn't even know his so-called father, and doesn't want to know him either. I'm only 23 years old single mom of a wonderful year old boy. So, if I sound like a vengeful bleep, you are correct. Family courts usually support a child's right to a relationship with both parents, even if a noncustodial parent isn't paying child support. It's been over and over with that witch. I was convicted by proxy and now have a criminal record I don't deserve! If you are fine without the other party, then quit complaining about extra money for "your child" please. It's not all about the money, but the emotional and understanding that parents should have towards the other. I do not know what the problem is, especially when dads want some type of recognition on the child's wedding day or graduation. Finally, he ends up in court after he refuses to pay her until he gets more time. The only way she is allowed by the courts to see them is if she goes through the visitation center and tests clean. I have one acre of land on which I did fall behind on the property taxes over the years to the tune of $8,000. The courts awarded custody of my husband's kid to their mother because he'd "shown no interest" in their infant after he came home to all his stuff outside. Neither the court nor authorities will do anything. As soon as i held payment she got child support involved. So a little extra money from a parent wouldn't hurt one bit. Retrieved from https://www.census.gov/content/dam/Census/library/publications/2016/demo/P60-255.pdf. They beg him to pay just $50 a week but he refuses. No way. There are lots of "good men" who are deadbeats. I got mad and threw them out the window because she just had me served at our home – the one I had to leave in front of my daughter, so I can't say a thing. But my grandson doesn't do without. I am a hard working woman who is strong and has always had a job since I was 17. How can I go about filing with the court. I have the solution. I was forced to settle out of court with joint custody (it was the best I was going to get). I have a friend who is trapped by one of the *mothers* who uses their horrible experience of being the one to give birth to the child (which I'd like to remind people if they really find it that hard then deal with it! At the hearing the judge told her she needed to bring documentation that she has been clean for 30 days and then she could get visitation. Mind you, we have only been broken up for three months. How do you fight someone you love without hurting them? CT support enforcement should have taken his drivers license so he couldn't get into the bars to watch football. It's more to what else she was doing but to make a story short he was awarded full custody of all three of his kids. This is 100 percent unacceptable. That's selfish? I have found myself going to food pantries and government agencies for help just to get by, but still can't make ends meet. The children's mother is a heroin addict and didn't even bother showing up to the custody hearing on time. You let the kids tell it. I am almost done! it's not a matter of who is first. In my case, my ex disappeared from the stat while she was pregnant, came back to town for three or four months just so our daughter would be born here, then she just disappeared out of state again for another three months. I told her i will give you the money when you let me see my son. Anyway, finally she left him. I work too! I cannot keep suing this man. Now it's time for her to step up to the plate and help with the bills: gas, electric, water, and such. My ex wasn't very stable, so I didn't move on any legal compulsion to get him to spend more time with our son or provide child support. Financially, I am just keeping myself and daughter above water. My husband and I have sole custody of his two daughters. So I did. He can talk to me about anything and yes, he doesn't lie/tell fibs ever. And setting an example for them about what a responsible parent does. I also have to use 10 percent or more of my net income for on road meals and necessities. When you're married and out of work, the state says, there's more money and good luck finding work and it leaves you be. After six years of marriage he decided he wanted to get back into partying and doing drugs. Don't pay child support and you could wind up homeless. All she can think of is the money and has even used the children as a weapon. You are missing out on what would have been probably the best experience of your life regardless of how you and your baby mama got along. It is common knowledge around town that he is offering discounts in exchange for cash payment. After all, it takes two to make a baby. To compound matters, the Family Responsibility Office has issued me a Summons to attend court for non payment of support for September! Would you want a felon accountant as your bank teller? However, he remarried many years ago and seems to have gotten himself together. If the father loses his job, he is expected to find another one. She owes child support. The parent is then ordered to pay the amount of child support that coincides with this level of income. Can I just say that this is full of crap. OK first off, for someone to say that women who seek child support are just lazy, don't want to work and are looking for a way to make the "father" pay, that could not be any further from the truth! So no, I think I have to waive my rights as father and give up the only thing and person who really loves me because I can't afford to be her dad and because I don't have it to give. She gets absolutely nothing until then. One way a friend of mine does is to ask his ex what do the children need or what do you need to take care of them? Paying child support Options for parents paying child support. My ex will not pay child support. Just the basics: $1795. It was in his best interests at that time. The federal government takes issue with parents who attempt to work the system and avoid child support payments. They never took it to court ever so they basically left everything to what they agree upon (what she wants). Here in Mecklenburg County, the CSS program is administered by the Mecklenburg County Child Support Enforcement Department. I have paid everything I owe and I know if I miss a payment she wouldn't hesitate again to take me to court. I can't buy my kids crap right now and he has the money to give me but his drugs are more important? I have a father who have not paid child support for months for my younger brother. He was ordered to pay child support. Notice the "we aren't together so I shouldn't pay" attitudes. Nothing like that. She is now almost $10,000 behind and my husband might see $30 every five months. @154 and other people in your mind set: What you are not getting, is that there are good Dads out there, who do pay their child support, and for whatever reason, fall behind. We know this because of my husband's friend. My husband has been reemployed for about a month and a half after two years of unemployment. I left him with his pills and his other women, and he thinks that's a reasonable excuse to avoid paying child support. I am adopted, and don't know my birth parents. Maybe I'm just sensitive, but I'm not stupid. I worked doing house construction. Shame on them. Why is the mother allowed to stay home and collect welfare, and food stamps and a child support check and do nothing? Filing contempt of court actions and issuing a bench warrant for the nonpaying parent’s arrest. But the oldest is nothing to this loser lady. After all this time I finally filed for child support. He has even told me he will not get a job because he won't have anything left making $7.25 an hour and having to pay not only for our two children, but for another child as well, plus medical for all three and back pay to me, the other child's mother, and the state of Texas back money for the medical care of all three children. I haven't received child support for over 18 months, and previously it was a total of $6 per f/n! So you are right that women would have a harder time paying child support, but if the woman doesn’t have the children in the first place then she has a drug problem or some other thing that the court believes makes her unfit. End of story. It's very pathetic that a father with an average salary jog cannot even afford a small apartment because of child support payments. I pay for shoes and clothes because the things they wear are shoddy. Application of Imputed Income Imputed income is not always applied. Nothing is ever done to this woman to make her help support her children. If my ex chooses to change his life and parent his son, it will be the better solution. Non Custodial parent going back to school he is going to need loans. Am I wrong to feel this way? he's always known how to manipulate the system, and he's only gotten better with age. Under the Child Support Enforcement Act of 1984, it is against the law for any father, presumed or assumed, to not pay court ordered child support to the custodial guardian, regardless of joint custody. Please help! I mean this was the man I spent most of my life with and the father of my children-- how could he deceive me any more than he had? He told me he did not want anything to do with his son if I am with another man. Mom and step dad actually didn't let me see Dad for over a year when I was about 13 because of the money he owed them. My husband has custody of his three children, the oldest is 12 and he has had full custody for seven years now. He then started paying me $150 like he was supposed to. I know there are two sides to every story -- but black and white don't lie. I see his pictures on social networking sites always at parties, concerts, events having a wonderful time while I put my grandson's needs first. This happened to a mother! You can run, but ya can't hide. That has only started within the last year and a half and my children are 8 and 9 years old. I have a court order for her to pay $212 dollars a month for two children. I honestly think he did it on purpose so I wouldn't want him to watch them ever again. If the men had half a brain and they actually found a woman like that then it’s their own fault for getting them pregnant. On top of that, there is a day not too far off when I get to try to explain why Daddy isn't here. My grandson's father was ordered by the court to pay $79 a week child support. I have really lost faith in the system. I visit my dad every once in a while still and he's like always buying stuff for himself and stuff. I will not have him breaking my sweet son's heart that way after he already loves his father so much. Most parents try very hard to take care of their children, but that's not always the case. Keep them apart, and a percentage of what they both make, if it gains interest and more money should be saved for college, and the kid could have a great setup. For many years, I tried to get the Child Support Enforcement Agency to do their job. Now he uses his broken hand as an excuse not to look for a job. Statistically, non-custodial women are less likely to pay than men. He tries to work under the table to avoid the $40,000 he owes to me. We had a daughter and a year later found out I was pregnant with twin boys. It's a lot easier for someone who does not have kids living with them to find employment. My boyfriend is a father of a little girl and pays child support to the mother. --Lady Zero. Oh, of course, they would be happy to help on the weekends or every second week to work on the roads to help pay child support. He doesn't see our kid but he pays and I never stopped him from seeing our boy. He claims he loves me and my daughter but won't do a thing for her. it's really a shame that this is how it is, but I have faith it will work out in the end. Just make sure the other parent is a good earner. She also made sure I would be left with all the bad debt. State laws vary on child support calculations. I have never kept the kids from him and in fact he has recently bought a home 1 street over from me. The state can then funnel the payers money though the system, work the money (process) and then send it out a week later. She used the kids just as a tool to extort me for money, and after reading some of these posts, it's obvious who you gold diggers are. All he thinks about doing with his money is gambling and doing drugs. So I pray that his father will try to do better and help me to raise this sweet boy by paying child support and moving on, knowing that I will never go back to him. they have to pay for things like the house for them all and clothes, food and toys as well. where's my justice? You can do this in one of the following ways: on your own, using the child support forms found on the California Courts’ website hiring a private attorney to file a petition for child support on your behalf, or asking your local child support agency to open a case and file for child support on your behalf. While I won't dive into details, I will say that I am in a rather precarious situation myself. On the day my mother took me and the kids in, in a rural area with no public transportation, no safe way to walk or ride a bike, he took away my car. Failure to pay child support can result in a jail sentence. I have 2 kids ages 7 and 9 with my ex. I am a parent who is doing both: receiving and paying. They are old enough that they know their dad has never been around even though he always knew where we lived (regardless of how many government agencies he sent my way), unfortunately they are also old enough that I cannot tell them to stay away from him. We don't rely on the child support but it's the point that she doesn't feel she has to financially support the children. Get an abortion before you push a living being out) to trap a man who's way too good for her into staying with her after he realized she was simply a master of distracting people away from her faults. I'm now 30, married with a child on the way. Newsflash: Custodial parents are not doormats and they earn every damn penny that's due. Well, all she's done is kill her own gift horse! Also, I want her friend to be arrested for abducting my son from my home while I was sleeping, and putting him on the street while making an anonymous call to Waterloo Regional Police on their landline and acting like a concerned citizen with Incited further Harassment by Cambridge CAS. I am paying support to my ex-wife and she is not cashing the checks. Ladies can be deadbeats too. I called him on the weekends, seeing if he wanted to visit with his son. I don't care if you make $6/hour or $60/hour; you should be helping feed, clothe and take care of your child, period! He is almost 5 feet tall and wears shoes bigger than my own! The worst part is that they still don't get taken care of when they are with her but if I report her to the SRS, they can take them away from me for letting them go, but yet I can't stop them from seeing her. Crap, it costs money to clothe, feed and educate a child! Dear father who won’t pay child support, you’re useless and I don’t know how you live with yourself. My son decided to stay with his dad, which broke my heart, so I decided to stay and try get him back as I live in a two bedroom flat I cannot have him here till I get a three bedroom house. Anytime I tried to find a job, he would tell me that it would be unfair to the kids. So for all parents out there whinging and complaining out there, stop. Texas courts can order either one of the parents or both to pay child support. This rapist hasn't paid since. "Dear father who won’t pay child support, you’re useless and I don’t know how you live with yourself. I worked off and on during our marriage, as money allowed me to do. Mothers are awarded sole custody for a reason. You may still need to pay some child support if you have a higher income than the other parent. That's not the point! Just because you didn't have one doesn't mean you have the right to complain about it. Ex won't pay child support . We lived a very "upscale" life. She deserves a good life and an education that will enable her to take care of herself and her own children if she ever ends up in a similar situation. That way, he can never again put another woman through the same stuff that caused his first divorce. He also had an older son. I do not get any joy out of knowing that my child's father could be arrested at any moment because he is thousands of dollars in the rears for owed child support. Quit being so selfish and do whatever is going to ensure the child's happiness, and that exclude, whining and degrading the opposing party! The result is the woman is depressed for the rest of her life and can’t move on, while the guy in the situation could care less! God bless us all. Note that unless you qualify for a fee waiver, there is a $25 annual fee to use the program. Yep, a 17 year-old boy’s insurance is high after an accident. Mine is $4600 behind. I work and always have, and clearly he doesn't give a crap. I put my career on hold to be the wife/mother and trust me, I would never do that again. He makes empty promises. It should be fair. He has tried calling to meet up to see her, or visit with her. I wo'nt stand by while he skirts by anymore. I have lost transportation and am in such a rough spot but the education is a very important part of my future. The kids’ dad can visit and call them whenever he wants. I just received a letter from a prosecutor with all the paperwork included to start paying child support, for a child that was born five years ago that I had no idea about. On the top of that she has a younger daughter about four years old, who she gave her to her cousin. The court previously ordered your ex to pay child support. Within a few months of moving back, my ex brought our son to me. 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